"The VeriSign Song"

[Satire]

To the tune of "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini"
(With apologies to Paul Vance and Lee Pockriss)

Lyrics Copyright © 2003 Lauren Weinstein
All rights reserved.

- - - -

We wondered why the Inter-net was failing,
It seemed that everything had gone insane!
Both Dot-COM and Dot-NET were derailing,
Then we realized where laid the true blame.

... Two three four, tell the people what's in store!

(boomp)

It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
That's what dear VeriSign seemed willing to say.
An itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
Then they implied we should just go away.

(Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-DA-ba-ba-ba-ba)

Web surfers worldwide found their trips diverted.
ISP mail queues spilled out on the floor.
Software 'round the whole globe was perverted!
But VeriSign simply showed us the door.

... Two three four, stick around we'll tell you more!

(boomp)

It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
A profit center that's bigtime they said!
An itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
And COM-plainers might as well just drop dead.

(Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-DA-ba-ba-ba-ba)

Fi-nally ICANN yelled a bit more loudly,
And VeriSign backed off -- yes, that is true.
But anyone who thinks the story's over,
I'll sell a bridge down in Brooklyn to you!

... Two three four, tell the people what's the score!

(boomp)

It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
Set up some wildcards then bucks would roll in.
An itsy bitsy teenie weenie change to DNS machinery,
VeriSign thought that it had a sure win!

From the user to the router,
From the router bits would soar!
But then VeriSign took over,
Guess there isn't any more!

(boomp!)

- - - -

--Lauren--